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And there came in a girl and said: Mea Culpa! I went to the wrong station!

By: The Goads

“I’m not going to hell I’m out of it” -A too meek person wrote & ascended to heaven.

The too meek person to walk this emotional sentimental hell on earth had to tell us on the way out the way to salvation, a way of thinking that May emancipate us from the old heavy yokes of hijacked lives, she knew some other ways for deliverance that will spare us the agonies which no one will volitionally opt for! The Quest is Now on us! How was that hell?! Hell No! What was that Hell?! Hell Yes! 

We could have known better if we would have the right story from A to Z, but since we don’t we have to infer and infer intelligently depending on the tiny sparky small hells inside each one of us. What was that Hell that a too meek person could not bear and had to choose to end her life to pass a message of a utopian non promised life. It needs more than a nation of disturbed minds to pass an immortal advice like the one we had without working for it, it was like a free work a faith that forces no one to believe in it But once embraced someone had to become an apologist for it.

The message or the advice is not to commit suicide to end one’s sufferings, that universal burden a messianic onus needed only one person to put her life for the rest of us and the gain is our awakening to the Hell we live in every day. On the way out and on the night of her last walk she was not asking those who will read her note to do anything but to have their eyes and minds fixated for awhile on every word she had to say and expecting nothing good from most of us, the masses of straitjacketed emulators of someone else’s ideals & “inherited piety”! She was telling us what we all hate to admit but blindly follow just to appease the smallest & the biggest circles of Straight-minded self-appointed guardians! The instant tranquilizing squads of sheeple societies ,ready-to-step-in force when the imperturbable people’s peace is threatened by a girl seeking her own peace of mind on her way at her terms.

She just wanted to retain her hijacked life and not to be in anyone’s image but her own. That’s the Hell she had to be crucified for and pay the hefty price just to pass through the thick skin of her fellow earthlings, the fallen ones who are not heeding their ongoing fall, 24/7 in denial attitude to any call for a second thought of realistic introspection but masters in brandishing their judgmental fingers when it suits them. 

It is an immortal combat with the real disturbed people-not aware of their conspicuous disturbance behind their rigidity- that we have to fight for our own identities in suppressive environments which depict all different paths from theirs in all hues of immorality, their most powerful tool of setting things right. No one travels that passage unharmed, you have to get your own share, it might be big or small but yet you still suffer sentimentally so deep and frown a million times before the end of the day, and that is every day under the indifferent though impartial heaven. 

Like in the Hunger Games of Suzanne Collins the kids have to compete to death and the survived may die in a new game against some other kid, it’s all in the system and we are all controlled by it and we are already the walking dead with false pride we strive to keep unblemished . In the futuristic “nation of Panem” survival is a capacity shared with no one. 

She who committed suicide leaving a golden weary note had closed doors on the feigned shame alluded to free thoughts and opened many doors to the vastness out there left uncharted in our people’s perceptions of life & how it must be conducted according to them and them alone. If Weltschmerz did not kill her I won’t wonder what did not!

Now ,no one dares to talk about the incident or mention the name of the girl, there will be legal consequences if anyone tries. Speaking from this Hell and swearing by it too how can we not preach the girl’s suicide note that was written by a tormented soul who loved us all to leave that note for us. It’s not just a death note, Not At All! Her note is a true Guide to the perplexed on this Hell of Hells.

Agents of Hell relent not! Rejoice Not, Gloat Not individually nor gregariously for Salvation is redefined & getting updates without your permission. 

May her memory be a blessing

Disclaimer: The views and opinions expressed in this article are those of the authors and do not necessarily reflect the position of OAHR